Sleep deprivation

Oh, to be able to sleep soundly. I have been having a hell of a week trying to get enough sleep. Maybe 2 of the last 5 nights have been good nights' sleeps. Yesterday was bad. I was so sleepy and exhausted (mentally that is), that I actually was snappy at Nathan. Now I'm sure some of you think, so what? Well, we're NEVER snappy at each other. It was only once and it was such a little thing to snap about, but I felt completely horrible the instant I did it. He said it was fine and actually kind of funny, but I still felt bad.

The last 2 weeks have been all over the map for me. My grandmother passing away, my mom leaving to go to Denmark, Nathan's parents almost 100% convinced they're moving to Nova Scotia, the truck not working, working, not working, deadlines at work creeping closer, contemplating changing jobs, the pool at the U having some sort of mechanical problem so no DWW class, etc., etc. I'm hanging on to my sanity and my temper by a thread here people! I resort to using my earphones at work, all day, every day, so I won't completely wig out on certainly guys at work.

I want it to be the 26th of April!! I want to go to France and relax for 3 weeks. At the moment, I'll admit I'm kind of in avoidance mode. I want to go away and forget about all of this, deal with it later. I know some of it will be resolved before we go, but at the moment, I feel like turtling.

And I need to buy some new capris. And socks.

To find the words

For more than a week now I have been trying to find the words to say goodbye to my grandmother. This has been much harder for me this time around, probably due to worry. I worry about my aunt, who has lost both her parents, her uncle and her husband in the space of about 9 months. I worry about my mom, who is in Denmark right now, dealing with the huge task of cleaning out her mom's little room at the nursing home and sorting all the stuff that was packed away after Morfar died last summer.

I'm sad Mormor is gone, but at the same time, I'm glad it was a peaceful passing and now she can be with Morfar. After living so long with one person (more that 65 years), it must have been extremely hard for her to be without him. But now they are together again, and I can almost feel them out there somewhere watching over all of us.

Goodbye.

Rest In Peace

It is with heavy heart that I must announce the passing of my dear friend, Strawberry Blue Viking. (For those of you that don't remember, SBV is my ipod)

SBV passed away suddenly on Wednesday night. He was an innocent, caught in the crossfire of a floor and a badminton net pole. For clarity: I hung my coat with SBV in the pocket on a badminton net pole at the university. Said pole promptly fell over with a crash to the floor.

I did not discover this tragedy until this morning, when I whipped out my trusty friend on the bus and discovered one of the headphones was cracked. Disappointing, but replaceable. Then I looked at the screen. A mess of broken digital inkiness. Sigh... So I had to listen to the lady with the bubbly belly laugh all the way downtown.

Time to shop for a new friend I guess... and quick. I can't stand that lady's laugh.

Tah Dah!

I just found this cool template online! Isn't it perfect? Ever so cute and just in time for spring. Do any of you html savvy people know how to center the blog in the window?

I got the Family Tree Maker software yesterday and had a lot of fun playing with it. It's very good and extremely easy to use. I'm excited about this project. I can't wait to have everything organized and clear (to me anyway!). If you're thinking of doing a family tree, I can recommend this program, even after just one day of usage. Very cool.

But now it might be time for a bed and a book. I had a headache for most of the day (related to the icky perfumey body wash I bought I think), and then I went and swam laps and then I shoveled the walk while Nathan cooked dinner. I am completely exhausted! But in a good way...

Places to go...

Nathan keeps giving me such good blog ideas! After looking at his list of things that he wants to do/see before he dies, I started thinking about my own list. Mine consists mostly of places to go, not surprisingly. I think I must have wanderlust. Anyway, here is the start of my list.

Ride the Trans Siberian Railway. I want to do this so bad! All the way from Moscow to Vladivostok. I don't know what season I want to do it in, but the whole thing sounds so adventurous and romantic.

Go North. In a similar vein, I would like to travel up to northern Canada. The Yukon, the Northwest Territories, Nunavut. Mostly, I think I want to see the landscape and the wildlife. Especially the musk ox. They're so cute and shaggy!

Walking tour of Spain. This actually fits quite nicely with Nathan's desire to go on a pilgrimage, and we didn't even plan it that way! I have a Lonely Planet book that is exclusively walking tours and they all look absolutely amazing. Now to pick one...

Australia. I want to go back just as a tourist. I want to go back to Adelaide and Uluru and then I want to go down the west coast. I know that the Great Barrier Reef is on the east coast, but the west is so wild and untamed and unpopulated that I think I would like it better. The natural land formations are amazing.

Fiji. I only stopped there for an hour on my way to Australia, but I've been in love with it ever since. The sunrise was beautiful, the airport was so quaint, and it just had an atmosphere that seeped into my soul. Must go there during the day next time.

Go on an African Safari. I don't care where. So long as there's hippos, I'll be happy. Lots and lots and LOTS of hippos. And yes, I know they won't let me cuddle them.

Develop our family tree. My uncle in Denmark has traced a branch of our family to way back in the middle ages (15th or 16th century, I can't remember) and I would like to expand on what he's done. Also, I'd like to do it was software program so we don't have to worry about losing a page or something. Inspired by these ideas, I bought a program on Amazon yesterday. It's even got website publishing software on it, to publish your findings. I'll keep you posted!

Become a gardener. I will make no aspirations to becoming a GOOD gardener, but I want to be one. I like to play in the dirt and watch things grow. Still hoping this will be my hobby.

Have a dog. I want one of my own. I want to do agility with it and cuddle it and love it. Must restrain myself....

And the big one...

Have a low stress, enjoyable, flexible, well paying job. 'Nuff said.

Well, that's my list so far. Like I said, mostly places to go, but I think it's all attainable eventually. I'd like to tick off the low stress job sooner rather than later, but that requires a certain effort by myself that I'm not quite willing to do yet. For the moment I can cope and my job has 2 of the 4 characteristics: well paying and enjoyable. Of course, the high stress has a negative impact on the enjoyability....

The world awaits. Travel safe!

Snore....

Is it 4:30 yet? I'm really sure it's time to go home now. Besides, all day yesterday I was convinced it was Friday, so that makes today Saturday and I'm working overtime, right? Sigh... I know, it doesn't really work that way. I can hope though...

Joy of joys, I'm going to do my taxes this weekend. I think I will make time for an afternoon nap on Saturday. Mmmmm, nap.

I guess I should at least LOOK like I'm working. The Blogger website just doesn't look like work, no matter how hard I try. Only and hour and a half left...

Happiness... It's all in your point of view

I was reflecting today on the bus why I can go from happy, content and satisfied to unhappy, stressed out and discontented within the space of a few days. (insert joke about female mood swings here).

For myself, I think it happens to be what I'm focusing on. Last week it was work, this week it's the murder mystery party we're hosting on Saturday. I don't think I really have less work now than I did then, but I have something else to think about that I consider more important. Yes, I consider a murder mystery party with my friends more important than work.

Also, I can work myself into a dreadful funk and basically convince myself that my life sucks. But then if I step back and look, it really doesn't. I have a nice job, a wonderful husband, a cozy house, caring friends, an upcoming trip to France, etc. My life doesn't suck. So why then are there some days when I think it does?

PERSPECTIVE!!!!!!

I think someone could spend their entire life focusing on negative things and completely miss out on everything wonderful and good. That makes me sad, and at the same time motivates me to keep all those good things in the front of my brain.

So my challenge for everyone out there: Post a comment and list a couple of things that make your life wonderful and that make you happy. Keep these in your head for the rest of the week and I think I can almost guarantee a reduction in stress!

Thanks to everyone for being wonderful things in my life.

Post Blues

Okay. I think I have sufficiently recovered from my bout of the blues. I did not have to work this weekend, so that improved my mood just on its own. This is how my Saturday went: Up at 9:30am. Had breakfast and read my book. Showered at 11am. Played a computer game. Lunch at 1pm and read my book. Baked cookies at 4pm. Made pizza for dinner at 5pm. Had pizza and beer and watched the hockey game with my boy. Went to bed. So, after much relaxing I think I have gotten over the blues...mostly. I'm still slightly stressed about my deadlines at work, but I have roped someone else into helping me out, so that should alleviate the pressure a bit. Also, I'm looking forward to a delicious long weekend when I get to spend 3 whole days with my hubby. Yea for Family Day!

The Blues

Reading Nathan's post this morning put me in mind of the blues. Unfortunately for me, this consists of me feeling down and out. The lack of sun here in Calgary is really starting to get to me. The deadlines at work piling up are really starting to get to me. The looming need to work overtime on Saturday is really starting to get to me. The lack of nice warm tops for work is really starting to get to me. The lack of sleep is really starting to get to me.

All in all, the world is getting me down. I feel incredibly weighted this morning, like there's somebody pushing down on me from above, trying to drive me into the ground.

To attempt to cheer myself up, or at least recharge, I will work extra hard today so (hopefully) I won't have to work on Saturday. I will go to the university after work and either swim laps or go to the gym before home time. Then, if I don't have to work on Saturday I might just say 'screw the chiropractor', sleep in and spend the day doing nothing. Like reading my book. Or watching some episodes of Frasier. I will take great joy in the nothingness of one whole Saturday. Maybe I'll bake some cookies and eat some dough as I do it. In short, I need some me time. I am completely sick of the world right now and it's efforts to drive me under. I will resist as best I can, armed with a good book, a fluffy duvet, flannel pyjamas and lots of napping.

Is It Just Me...?

As I have caught yet another cold and I sit at my computer, struggling to make my eyes focus on the monitor, a thought occurred to me. Am I alone in my strangeness when I'm sick? And yes I know I'm generally strange anyway, but this strangeness is related to my eyes. When I get sick, my pupils become extremely dialated. And fixed. Light levels don't really affect them. The sicker I get the bigger they get. And we're talking huge here people. Over Christmas when I was sick there were times when I only had a couple millimeters of iris showing. Nathan says I look freaky when that happens. And of course, it makes it almost impossible to focus on anything and makes me a little trippy. Does anyone else out there experience this or is it just me?

The Joy of Water

I was contemplating the joy of water this morning on the bus. I'm a big water drinker when I'm at work (not so much at home). It's not uncommon for me to drink a litre and a half or two litres a day. It makes me feel so much better and more awake. Also, last night was my first Deep Water Workout class at the U of C. It was really good, really hard, and I was completely exhausted afterwards, but in a good way. I already feel skinnier and fitter. Funny how that works. After the class, I took off the belt and just floated for a while. There is nothing that makes me feel more relaxed and at peace than floating in a pool of water. It's simply divine. Sound is muffled, your body is weightless and it's just wonderful. I think I will be spending a lot of time in the pool over the next couple of months. Deadlines are piling up for me and I think I will be seeing a lot of OT in the near future. At least I've got the pool.

Witty and Insightful, I'm not

Hmm, we'll after reading the posts of my sister and sister-in-law, I'm afraid I'm quite lacking in the witty and insightful posts. On the other hand, I'm well on my way to the "conversational" style of blogging that Vanessa mentioned.

Nathan and I saw Casino Royale last night. What a good Bond movie! I liked it a lot. The opening chase scene across a construction site was particularly thrilling for me! Of course, I just about wiggled out of the seat because of all the heights. I just can't handle heights, even in a movie. My stomach was plunging up and down as Bond went up and down. I'm surprised I can even get on the skip at Livingston. Bare metal cage on the outside of a building, lurching up and down... shudder... Perhaps that's why I've been taking the stairs lately...

In other news, I went to the chiropractor for the first time in 7 years on Saturday. That was a bit painful. Not too bad, but by mid afternoon I was thoroughly sore. I've been having trouble with my tailbone lately, so I thought maybe it was time to go back.

Another thing that has been occupying my thoughts lately is children. I seem to know so many people who are pregnant, there are tons of people on my bus who are pregnant, and for some reason, the other night I was dreaming about Caspian (Nathan's nephew). Apparently I said his name in my sleep the other night... Don't worry though! No baby plans for Sheila yet! I've got places to go and yards to landscape! =D

I can't wait for spring to see my bulbs that I planted last fall. I acutally bought a potted hyacinth at Safeway, so I could smell it and enjoy the colours. Spring is coming! We're closer than we were yesterday!

Just a quick comment...

Today the temperature has finally dropped and winter has returned/arrived to Calgary. So now here's the question: Why is it that so many people refuse to dress for the weather? Strangely, almost all the people in their teens and twenties are embracing the cold weather wardrobe, and all the downtown, executive types are wearing thin leather jackets, no scarf, no touque and only gloves about 70% of the time. AND, then they walk around with their (sometimes gloved) hands over their ears! This is what I don't get. All these people are supposed to be smart and accomplished and secure in their self image, but they refuse to have hat hair!?! This is Calgary people! Everyone knows what touque hair is! Live with it! I've almost decided to quite styling my hair in the morning, since it looks nothing like what I started out with by the time I get to work.

Anyway, that's my little rant for the morning. Buy touques people! Be warm AND stylish, if you have to. Myself, I just go for warm. =D

Calling all Opinions!

I am searching for opinions everyone! Not about just anything though...

The bookstore is looking to purchase/upgrade the publishing program that it currently uses to make the newsletter. As I have volunteered to take over the making of said newsletter, I was wondering what opinions people had about desktop publishing programs. The current one is Microsoft Publisher (not sure which version). David wanted to know if I wanted something else or just the newest Publisher. Any ideas anyone? This is kind of critical, since a new newsletter is supposed to be out well before Teachers Convention and if I have to make new templates, it could take me a while. Let me know if you have any thoughts, or if you know of any dirt (good or bad) about any of the publishing programs out there.

Back to the Grind

Well, I guess it's all back to normal now. No more Christmas frenzy, no more holiday days, no more staying up late and sleeping till noon. Sigh... For some reason I find this incredibly sad this year. I'm guessing it's because I kind of "missed" Christmas due to my cold. I was just starting to get better and then the whole thing was over. Kind of disappointing. Oh well. There's always next year!

Despite the sickness, I had a good holiday from work. I really like that our office is closed between Christmas and New Years. It gives everyone a bit of a break from insane deadlines, crazy interior designers and completely whacked out clients.

In other news, Nathan and I booked our plane tickets to France yesterday! Wheeeeee!!!!! I can't wait. We leave April 26th and come back on May 17th. We wanted to time it so we had the May long weekend to get over jet lag before we had to go back to work. On our list of things to see and do:

• Go all the way to the top of the Eiffel Tower
• the Louvre
• Tour of Notre Dame Cathedral
• Parc Asterix
• Normandy
• Mont St. Michel
• Marnay-sur-Seine
• Northern France to visit the area where Nathan's great grandma was from
• An antique arms dealer that Nathan wants to visit (I'm sure you can all guess what he's hoping to find!)

This is just what I can remember at the moment, but needless to say, we will be having a ton of fun for 3 weeks! In the meantime, I will be working some overtime to save up the extra hours we'll be away over and above my vacation time. Such a flexible company I work for.... =D

Also, in the spirit of the New Year, I have been thinking about resolutions. And having a hard time thinking of anything! Not that I'm saying I'm perfect, but I am quite happy with my life and the direction that it is going in. That being said, I have come up with a couple of things that I want to keep doing and/or elaborate on.

1. Continue to go to the gym 3 times a week. I will be getting a membership to the UofC this year, as I want to start swimming laps again, but still have the option of doing weight training or cardio.
2. Expand my search for a hobby. Everyone I know has at least one thing that they enjoy doing on their own time, and I've been having a problem finding one for myself. I tend to have really short lived hobbies. I will really like something for a couple of months and then lose all interest in it and start something else. I'm hoping gardening will turn out to be "the hobby" for me. I get really excited about pretty much every aspect right now, so hopefully I will have some successes and advances this year to keep my interest piqued.
3. Eat more fruit and vegetables. This is a perennial resolution for me. Eventually I might get my intake to where it should be...
4. Expand my book collection.... Okay, I guess that doesn't really count as a resolution, but if I put it in the list then I'm allowed, right?? =D

All the best to everyone in 2007!

Not Fair!

It's simply not fair at all. Why am I sick NOW??? Four days before Christmas and I can barely drag myself out of bed. I suppose the good thing is that hopefully I will be mostly over it by the weekend, but it still sucks. Another good thing is that we have no engineer bosses at work for the rest of the week, and one of the other bosses took one look at me and said "Why are you here?" Because I have a stupid meeting at 9am, that's why. "So you're going home at 9:30 right?" That sounds like a very good idea. I think I'll skip out on tomorrow too. Sigh... I hate being sick..... At least I can play Katamari now. Yes, that's right! Nathan and I bought a Playstation2 with the gift card we got from my work for our wedding. Yea for Katamari!

Sniffles and snorts, Sheila

Fixed! ... mostly

Okay, now Amazon is sending out the items that they have ready (still missing one) and have removed any shipping charges from my order. Whew! So it's only Vanessa who might be missing a present on Christmas Eve. Sorry Ness! I'll mail it up to you if it doesn't come in time.

I can stop panicking now...

Why, oh why

Why is my Amazon order now not going to make it in time for Christmas? I ordered everything on November 18th. They sent me an email TODAY that one item was delayed 4 to 6 weeks, but that the rest should arrive before Christmas. I went in and deleted the delayed item, and now the rest of my shipment won't arrive until AFTER Christmas! How does that work! I upgraded my shipping to the fastest possible, but it's still not for sure. I hope it works out though, otherwise I'm kind of screwed for a lot of presents. Grumble, grumble....

Questions for the universe

Why do people on the bus in the morning have to be so darn chipper and loud? There are these 3 women on my bus that giggle and talk really loud for the entire ride. It's very irritating. I mean, I'm a morning person, but they're so bad that it even gets to me.

Why do authors take such a long time to come out with the next book in their series? Some are really good and churn one out about every year, which is reasonable to me. Others take 3, 4 or 5 years between books and then I'm so lost I have to read the entire series over again. Not that that's especially bad.... I mean, if they're going to take that long, don't write a series!!

Why do I really, REALLY want to play Katamari?

Why do people insist that Christmas is first and foremost a "religious" holiday, while at the same time going all out with super expensive presents from Santa? This makes no sense to me....

Why do interior designers put sinks where it is absolutely impossible for me to drain them? Why do they get all huffy when I tell them it won't work?

Is it holiday time yet?

Good To Be Home

Ahhh.... Good old Canada. I can feel the serenity now....

Well, I got back into town early this morning (4:30am) and promptly passed out until 1pm this afternoon. I was completely unaware of anything going on around me. Nathan showering, Nathan leaving, phone calls, I missed it all.

So the Vegas business trip was good. The conference was awesome, despite some small hiccups. Tuesday I was completely overwhelmed by the 7500 other people, courses that weren't the best (but I knew that would be the case before hand), a headache, bitchy people, couldn't find the shuttle bus, etc. that I just sat down in my hotel room and had a good cry.

The Venetian Shops area.... Nice ceiling

The rest of the week was really good though. I had some really good seminars that gave me a lot of good ideas about how to organize the CAD stuff at ESA and I picked up some good tricks for all of the other drafters in the office. I think it was definitely worth the money, though I would much prefer to be a the hotel where the conference is taking place next time. The shuttle bus was convenient, but it was still one more thing to worry about.
I met a lot of neat people and will keep in touch with some of them I'm sure. Some were completely arrogant and rude, and others were really great. I suppose you get all kinds.
I feel completely naked without my name tag now. I feel like I should be checking my schedule or something...

The Strip

As for Vegas itself, I have NEVER EVER been to such a commercial place. The entire place is centred around getting you to spend money. All of the hotels that I was in, you had to go through the casino to get anywhere. Back to the lobby, the elevators, the conference centre, the shops, it didn't matter. Somehow you had to go through the middle of the casino to get there. I'm not entirely sure HOW they accomplish it, but there it is. Slot machines in the airport, sensored minibar items (if you pick it up, you bought it), shops full of junk, and so on. At the beginning of the week, it was all very impressive, but by the end I was sick of the commercialism, the noisy gambling machines, the guys trying to hand out stripper ads on the streets, the priests who were definitely not priests trying to collect money for the "poor", the guys with their sandwich boards spouting off about the end of the world and redemption... It was a bit too much for me, I'll admit. I like nice little Canada, calm little Calgary. I guess I'm a "country" girl at heart. =D

My hotel, Mandalay Bay.

Very swank... Felt I should dress up to use the bathroom